Having a toddler is hard work. Having a toddler and an infant is nearly impossible. Everyone told me it would be hard... and my response has always been, "I know, but it's temporary". I still believe this, but this "temporary" is probably going to be a bit longer than I anticipated.
Marco is being such a sweet and loving brother... to Jonas. To me, however, he's being a terror. I know that this has been a big change for him and that he needs time to adjust. I have tried giving him his own time, exclusive of Jonas. I have explained to him, in nice tones, that he has to help Mama and be cooperative. But, it's not working and I end up wanting to scream my head off.
Today, I was brave. I got two babies ready, and loaded up into the car (with Mau's help) and we went to MOPS this morning. It took me 2 hours from the time I woke up to the time I got in the car, but I did it... and was only 5 minutes late!
We saw a DVD of a message by Julie Barnhill, and it was great. She spoke on being "One Tough Mom". Basically, speaking to moms with children of all ages, saying that we have to take back control. "Who's the boss"... "I am"! And, she gave the perfect example of my life... she said, "have you ever talked to your 18 month old and wondered where his mom is and then realized that YOU'RE his mom?" YES! This is my life. Who is this toddler, why is he disobedient, and where is his parent? Oh, wait, I'm supposed to parent him... but I'm too tired!
She said we have to learn to be consistent. Once again, I'm too tired to be consistent. But, when I think of it, and I remember my teaching days... consistency IS KEY! If I say "no" today, then it must be "no" tomorrow and the day after. But jeez, sometimes I honestly don't give a rats booty if he touches the "off limits" books. Sometimes, I could care less if he climbs up on the table. I'M TOO TIRED TO CARE! But, for the sake of my parenting and the future battles that I MUST WIN, I have to care.
So, I listen to this awesome message, (and if you get a chance to Youtube her or read her book, you should). I'm PUMPED UP... as we all are after hearing an encouraging word. I feel like I can do this... I AM one tough Mama, and Marco had BETTER watch out!
Then we get into the parking lot. I have Jonas strapped to my chest in the Moby wrap. I walk Marco to his side of the car and open his door. He proceeds to THROW himself on the parking lot floor in a fit of rage. Why?... because HE wants to drive. He does not want to sit in his car seat, and how dare I even suggest it?! So, while I have Julie's message running through my head, and all the other MOPS moms eyes on me, I nearly have a melt down in the parking lot. I wanted to beat my child.
I ended up letting him climb into the car and do as he pleased while I took care of Jonas. Once Jonas was in and safe, I "took care" of Marco. I had to grab him and STUFF him into his car seat, all while he's kicking and screaming. Mauricio tells me I just need to be more patient... but patience seems to be something on high demand but short supply these days. I WILL NOT pray for patience, because then God will REALLY teach me a lesson.
For now, I've just got to learn a few tricks, try to calm myself down first, remember to stay consistent, learn to say "no" and MEAN it and try to take control and responsibility for my toddler. Pray for me.
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