Nice, Kind and Gentle

These three words, (nice, kind and gentle) have been seared into my brain.  Just like that... in that exact order.  Mind you, not because I needed the reminder as a child, I was NOT the problem child.  This phrase came into existence when my little brother, Jorge, who is 13 years younger than me, was a toddler.  Oh, Jorge was such a cute baby, but very rambunctious and kinda rough.  He never intended to hurt anyone, but always did.  So, my father came up with this catch phrase of sorts, "Jorge, be Nice, Kind and Gentle".  To a toddler, this means nothing, but as the years went on, and we continued to drill it, he began to grasp it.  In fact, at the age of 4, he was so drilled that one day my father said, "Jorge- Nice, Kind---" and he was interrupted my a 4 year old smarty-pants "yeah, yeah, nice, kind and gentle, OK!"  LOL.  What a character!
So, now that I'm a mom, I've been finding myself saying these words to Marco.  Marco, who is only 10 months!  The baby who thinks the word "no" is funny.  But, I'm hoping, that like with my brother, these words will begin to mean something eventually.
Now, I got to thinking... not only should toddlers, kids and teens learn this lesson, but what about us?  I know most of us moms have no problem being nice, kind and gentle with our bodies... but what about our mouths?  This is our downfall.  For some reason, I feel God has really been laying these 3 words heavily on my heart.  He said "Nicole, you want your baby to be nice, kind and gentle... but are you being these things to him?  How about to your husband?"  Uhhh, don't you hate it when He pierces you in the heart?!  But it's so true!  How can I expect my child to be portray these characteristics with his body and his mouth if I am not exemplifying them in my house?
Ladies!  We NEED to watch our words!  How many times have we used sarcasm to seem funny or non-chalant and in turn cut someone down?  Has this happened to you?  It has to me!  Like this... baby screaming in the back seat, I turn to my friend and say "aren't babies SUCH a blessing?".  Wow, that shames me!  Could my 4 month old understand me?  No... but a 4 year old would!
For those of us moms with young babies, even if they don't understand what is coming out of our mouths, we need to begin practicing now.  There is nothing more obnoxious than a sarcastic 4 year old... and where do you think he/she learns it from?
What kind of mom do you want to be?  I know that I want to exemplify the fruits of the spirit... easier said than done, right?  I mean, why stop at nice, kind and gentle?  In Galatians 5:22 it says "But the fruit of the spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self control...".
Love... I want my babies to KNOW beyond a shadow of a doubt that I am in LOVE with them.  I never want them to feel like they're a burden or something to be ashamed of, but LOVED.  We show our children abundant, unconditional love, and then they can see how much MORE their Father in Heaven loves them!
We are showing our sons and daughters what a picture of a woman is.  Is a mother someone who is always stern, someone with hands on hips, rolling eyes and sighing?  We've all said it about our own mothers... "I will NEVER do this like her".  And, it's inevitable, our children will say it about us too.  But, I'd rather hear "I will NEVER be disorganized the way she was" than "I will NEVER treat my children the way she did".  BIG DIFFERENCE!  I want my son to know the way a loving wife and mother behaves, so that when he is in the market for a wife, he may choose wisely.  I want my daughter (if I ever have one) to understand the role of a wife and mother and become a happy one.  We are shaping our children- beginning at birth.
My prayer for you, moms that will one day be, new mommies, and veteran mothers-  That God may put the desire in our hearts to be more LIKE Him.  That he will begin to reshape and reform our minds to THINK like Him.  That the words that come out of our mouths are for lifting up and not tearing down.


Jesse & Stephanie Doyle said...

Thank you so much for posting this! This is something that I continuously struggle with and now that I am a mother I need to conquer this struggle now more than ever.
You are such a strong woman to post this and I am blessed to of read it.

jorge said...

I'm proud of you, daughter. You have wisdom beyond your years.