Written on Their Little Hearts

You know, sometimes I really don't give my kids enough credit.  I think, oh, they're too little to do this, or that... we'll wait til their older.

Like with praying.  I had been praying for them and over them since they were in my belly, but WITH them?  No, I thought it was better to wait til they were older... until I realized, WHY Wait?!  We began night time prayers and progressed with meal time prayers, and now, 9 times out of 10, they remind ME to pray with them!

But still, I didn't give them credit.  I still wanted to wait til they were older with Bible verse memorization.  I figured that it was going to be too difficult, and honestly, would they REALLY remember these verses word for word for life?  Probably not... I know I don't!  Try as I might, I have a hard time memorizing scripture and especially references... I'm always like "somewhere in the Bible I know it says"... which is about the most unhelpful thing ever.  Thank God for Google... seriously!

So I figured that my limitations would also be theirs, I mean, they're PREschoolers!  But oh, how I was proven wrong.

One day, coming home from church, Marco (at the time he was 3), began reciting the Bible verse they had learned, and Jonas (at the time he was 2) was following along slowly behind.  I.Was.Amazed.

I began thinking about the whole point of scripture memorization.  Yes, of course, it's so that you can bring it up to help others, to answer questions, to offer encouragement or share the Truth... but that's all outward.  What about the inward reason?  Isn't it important to learn, meditate and memorize these verses to help US daily?  To help us remember that we are children of the one true God.  To help us resist temptation and lies when they come at us.  To have the Truth so so so engraved on our hearts and minds that we don't even have to THINK about it... it's second nature.  To know the Word is Truth as simply and obviously as we know that the sky is blue or that the grass is green.

This is exactly what I want for my children.  And what better time than RIGHT NOW to begin putting those words in their mouths that will be written on their hearts.

So that hopefully, when (not if) struggles come their way, they can lean on the truths that they have been declaring since before they can remember.  So that they can hang on the promises and goodness of God.  So that they know that even if they don't have each other, or me, that they have Him and He is enough.

I bought a white board and hung it in my kitchen.  My plan was to teach and review one Bible verse a month.  I don't drill it or shove.  I teach it by repetition and using hand motions.  We say it sometimes when I'm in the kitchen preparing their food and always at night before bed.  They love it and always ask for more or want to also recite the ones from the past.

Here are some of the scriptures we have already done:
- "I praise you because you made me wonderful" Psalm 139:14
- "Love the Lord your God with all your heart, with all your soul and with all your mind" Matthew 22:37
- "I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me" Philippians 4:13
- "The Lord is good to all" Psalm 145:9
- "God saw all that He had made, and it was very good" Genesis 1:31
- "Give thanks to the Lord for He is good; His love endures forever" Psalm 136:1 *This month

As you can see, we haven't been doing it that long at all, but it is something I love and cherish and plan to continue.  We started when the boys were 3 and 2, but I wish we hadn't waited so long.

If this is something that's important to you and your family, let me encourage you not to wait!  Start today!  Give your child some credit... even if she/he's too little.  Try it and you might be surprised, as I was.  They are little sponges and are picking up more than we think.  And even if you have a baby, who will obviously not recite after you... pray these verses over her.  Let her hear you speaking the Truth to her.  We are planting a seeds in our children's hearts and I know that this is just one of the ways He has showed me how to water it.

"I will my law on their minds and write it on their hearts. I will be their God, and they will be my people"- Jeremiah 31:33

Patience is a Virtue

Yesterday at MOPS we discussed having patience as a mom.  It definitely hit home with me and was something that I KNOW I have to work on.  Although I love my kids with every fiber of my being, I can sometimes have a short fuse with them or not give them the time they deserve.  I expect things to be done quickly and efficiently, when I know that they are not yet capable of doing that.

The worst time of the day for me (and many mothers, I'm sure) is the morning when trying to get out of the house.  On the days we don't have a set appointment, like we're just going to the mall or the park, there's no problem.  But on the days I have scheduled something for us, like MOPS, a bible study, church, play date, or a doctors appointment, all hell seems to break loose.  It's like Murphy's law... everything goes wrong.

It starts with getting dressed.  Jonas is easy, he has no opinion.  But Marco is quite a challenge.  Even being a boy, he has his opinion on his clothing.  He ONLY wants to wear shirts with beloved characters on it... Cars, Toy Story, Mickey.  Everything else is tantrum worthy.  But I don't have an entire wardrobe filled with these specialty shirts, so eventually he's gotta wear something else.  Then the socks... they have to be on just right and they have to either be Cars or soccer socks... plain ones just will not do.

Then brushing of the teeth... again, Jonas lets me get off easy on this one... for now.  But Marco is all, "Marco do it".  He wants to put the paste on by himself and he wants to brush by himself.  This all takes precious time... tick tock... because I still have to go over what he's done and redo it the right way.

By the time we get to the kitchen for breakfast, I can physically feel my temper rising.  I am about to boil over.  I prepare Jonas' milk and give it to him... but then he throws it all up (well, he did today), so then I have to clean up.  While I'm cleaning him up, I see him grunt and poop... so then I have to clean him up.  When I finally make it back and prepare breakfast, I have to deal with Marco not wanting to feed himself and Jonas shaking his head "no" at the food.  If I make oatmeal, Marco wants a yogurt... if I give him yogurt, he wants a waffle... you see?  It's enough to drive anyone nuts.

As we're entering the car I have officially HAD it and I do boil over.  Many times with yells of "GET IN THE CAR AND CLICK!" or "IF YOU DON'T CLICK IN 3 SECONDS, YOU'RE GONNA BE IN BIG TROUBLE".  (I put caps, because obviously I'm screaming).  And I know I've lost it.  And I know I shouldn't.

For some of you new Mama's maybe it's that 3am feeding that makes you boil over.  I used to want to cry when Jonas wouldn't go back to sleep.  Or if, in my sleepy daze, I'd snap the pj's incorrectly and then have to start all over... I would want to punch a wall.  I know... I know.

I do know that wherever we are on this journey of motherhood, we WILL lose our patience... and we will boil over.  But we must remember to gather ourselves, however we can, and offer GRACE to our children.  After all, doesn't our heavenly Father have an ABUNDANCE of patience for us?  How many times can we make Him want to boil over... but instead of lashing out, He offers us his grace and mercy and love.

Here's what the Bible say's about patience (one of the many things):
Therefore, as God’s chosen people, holy and dearly loved, clothe yourselves with compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience. Colossians 3:12


I was really convicted by this discussion yesterday because it dawned on me... If we are called to be patient and loving towards everyone, how much more towards our very children!  They are learning from our every move.  They are learning what a Christian household looks like.  They are learning what a mother and wife looks like.  They are learning about who Jesus is from us!  If we are not exemplifying Jesus' characteristics, are they in fact learning about Him?

You do not need to travel to Africa to have a mission field.  God has placed a mission field in your own house... with your own children.  We are the ones that need to show them Jesus daily... through our compassion, our kindness, our humility, our gentleness, our patience and our love.  God's given me HIS children... I need to be sure I care for them well.

I need help practicing my patience.  What works for you?  Do you internally count to 10?  Maybe to 100?  Do you walk away?  Do you pray?  I need tips!  And, more than that, I need prayer.  I'll pray that God gives you patience in dealing with His children and you do the same for me.  Thanks!

Opened Doors

Whenever I've had a big decision to make, my prayer has always been the same: God, if it's for me and if it's the best thing for me, make it happen.  If it isn't, then close that door and don't even allow it to be an option.  I have never prayed for God to make something specific happen, because I truly believe with all my heart that His plans are far greater than any of our plans.

"For I know the plans I have for you," declares the LORD, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future."  Jeremiah 29:11


Before I graduated from college, I was toying with the idea of heading off to grad school in New York to pursue my opera career.  I had an audition (round 2) at the Manhattan School of Music.  Very prestigious.  But I had been in this really great relationship for about a year and I knew in my heart of hearts that if I moved, that relationship would fall apart.  I begged God to show me which door to walk through.  When I stepped off the plane in NYC for my audition, the cold air hit me square in the face and within an hour of arriving I had completely lost my voice.  How was I supposed to have an opera audition with no voice?  This was a CLEAR message from God that NYC was not the place for me.  And I'm so happy I listened to him and walked through that door... that boy I was dating became my husband, my best friend and the father to my children.

When I was a recent college grad, I had another decision to make.  I could stay in Miami and get a job or try to move to Orlando.  Mauricio had just decided to attend school in Orlando, and again I feared that a long distance relationship would be detrimental.  But I couldn't just go to Orlando and live with nothing to do... I had to find a job.  I gave myself 3 days.  I told myself that God was the ultimate provider and if I was meant to live in Orlando and follow Mauricio, that He would make it happen.  I went to Orlando for 3 days to try and find a job... if I didn't succeed then that was God closing that door.  I went and received 3 job offers in that time and decided to take one.  I packed up my bags and moved to Orlando, trusting completely that it was in God's will for me.  And I'm so happy I did... my relationship grew in strength, I met some wonderful people who are still my closest friends, and I rededicated my life to Jesus and began to act like the Christian I always claimed to be.  I fell in love with Jesus in Orlando.

When Mau and I had been married for a year, we began having that baby itch.  But, with Mau out of work, it was impossible to start a family.  Then one day out of the blue, Carol called and told Mau that her husbands company was hiring and would put in a good word for him.  Only problem was that the job was in Greenville, SC.  Well, we had to trust the Lord and walk through the doors that He opened.  We knew we wanted babies, and if moving the Greenville was the only way to get them, then we'd move.  And we did.  Do you know, the SAME day Mauricio started working in Greenville I got a positive pregnancy test!  I was pregnant with Marco.  That's God!  And I'm so happy we listened and moved to Greenville... I was able to stay home and take care of my baby, and then God blessed us with a second baby!

Now, since we moved to Greenville, our family has been whining and complaining about how far we live.  And I know, it is far.  So, since coming here, our prayer has been the same... lead us where we should go.  For two and a half years we heard nothing.  But now we have.  God opened up this door for us to be able to move back to Miami.

I have all these doubts and worries about moving back.  What will my life look like?  Will I be able to afford to remain a SAHM?  Will my family drive me bonkers?  I even started thinking that maybe this wasn't from God.  Maybe it was our will, or better yet, our parents' will, but not God's.  But then I had reassurance... Adele told me something great, "All good things come from God".  If this wasn't from God, it wouldn't have been laid out before us so perfectly.  Mauricio wouldn't have gotten the job.  He wouldn't have been made a generous offer.  We wouldn't have had 3 showings TODAY to show our apartment and be released from our lease agreement.  God is taking care of every.single.little.step.  Why do I doubt?

"And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose."  Romans 8:28


So, here we go.  Walking into the unknown.  But, the door was opened by God.  So whatever lays beyond it is from Him and for us.  As long as we keep praying to Him, seeking His will and obeying, how can we ever be lead astray?

Growing in Wisdom

The most important job that God has ever given me is to be a mother.  But not just any mother.  I've been called to be a Godly mother who raises up Godly children to become Godly men.  Godly men who love Him above all things and lead their households in His ways, and in turn raise up more Godly children.  Isn't it a beautiful cycle?

This is a huge task that has a lot of responsibility and burden.  This is not an overnight miracle... it's something that we'll have to work on daily for the rest of our lives!   So I've been thinking and praying about how I might go about doing this.  And you know what God told me?  He said, "Know me first".

Ok, so I have to know God before I can teach Him... this makes sense.  But THAT TOO is a task that'll take daily work for the rest of my life!  I mean, you never say, "now I know you... done".  No, you're constantly knowing and learning knew things about someone... even your spouse!

I love Jesus and I know my heart belongs to Him... but I'm lazy.  With all the recreational reading I do, rarely do I pick up a Bible.  How do you get to know someone?  Spend time with them.  How do you get to know Jesus?  Spend time in His Word.  I need to spend time in His Word so that I might get to know Him more and become the Godly mother I was told to be.

I've begun a reading plan of the Psalms and Proverbs.  One chapter of each per day.  If I'm trying to gain wisdom and understanding to be a better parent, where better to begin but in Proverbs, which speaks wisdom at every page turn!  And the Psalms are like poetry that feeds my heart and pleases His ears.

I've only done it for 8 days, (so don't be too impressed yet), but I am going to make a real effort to make this a priority in my life.  I can't start trying to obtain wisdom and understanding when my babies are teenagers... it'll be too late then and my life will be a hott mess!  I have to start now.

My prayer is that God engraves his truths and wisdom on my heart so that I might remember to apply it  always.

I downloaded this app onto my iphone (not the BB) and it's helping me keep track of what I've read and how far I have to go.  It has a bunch of different reading plans and cool things like notes and bookmarks that can be private or shared.  It also links up with Facebook and Twitter.  Making it easy to read wherever I am... and hard to find an excuse not to!

*Oh and by the way, if you would like to leave a comment but don't know how, there's a little button on the top of this post, next to labels that says "comment".  Click there and the comment box will appear.  This new formats a bit different.  Thanks for reading and leaving a comment! *

It Takes a Village

Certain people tell us that because we live so far away, we have "no support".  They say that living at a great distance from our family will cause severe relational problems in the future.  They say that they are missing out on the lives of their grandchildren.  It makes me sad to think about these things.  The truth is, we do not want to live so far from our family, and we have absolutely no intention of keeping Greenville as our permanent residence.  For right now, this is where we are, and we have to make due.
But, as for the "no support"... I can not disagree more.  Throughout the last month and a half, throughout my hospitalization, birth, NICU runs, and even now that our baby is home I have been astonished by the amount of support given to us by family, friends, students and neighbors.
As soon as I was hospitalized, my mom booked a flight and was in town the very next day to help take care of Marco.  It was important to me that his daily life was not interrupted or too out of whack because I was missing.  She was here for 17 days and did an amazing job holding down the fort and keeping my son happy.
Once my mom left, my mother-in-law arrived to take over.  She also became Marco's buddy... taking him to the park, to bouncing babies and wherever else he could release some energy.  Throughout her time here, she made sure all I had to worry about was going to the NICU.  She made meals for us everyday and enough to freeze for later meals.  It was delish!
And this week that just passed, my father and step-mom came into town.  They kept Marco entertained so that I could devote more time to Jonas.  They took Jonas from me and forced me to nap!  Vivian cooked and cleaned and did laundry and even took me on a shopping spree!  I was totally spoiled!
Well, that was all family, and although their time here was invaluable to me, it was also sorta expected.  I expect to be able to lean on and rely on my family during my time of need... and boy was this a time of need!  I am grateful they were all able to take days off of work, book flights and come up to be my slave for a few days.
There were 2 weeks in between family visits where we were on our own.  Jonas was still in the NICU, so in order to be able to see him during the day, I had to find a sitter for Marco.  And in order for Mau and I to be able to visit with him in the evenings, again I had to find a sitter.   So, 2 babysitters PER day! I was amazed at how many people offered and where able to take time out of their lives to watch my little boy.  During the day, I had Carol, Brooke, Anne (Carol's mom), and Kim stay with him.  Anne even took the day off of work!  At night, we had Stefania and Leo, my student Anna, and Kim (with baby Sloane).  I was so touched that people came over after being busy all day to sit at our house while we went to the NICU.
Although I appreciate everyone, My MVP babysitter was Kim.  I've only known Kim a few short months, after meeting at the community pool.  We quickly became friends and see each other at bouncing babies, and around the community while she walks her dog.  When she offered to help me, I don't know if she thought I'd really take her up on it.  She came over with her little 9 month old daughter, Sloane, and spent several evenings sitting on my couch while we went to the NICU.  She rearranged her "night time" schedule, to help me.  (Moms, be honest... that "night time schedule" is sacred... would you have rearranged it?  I don't know if I would have.)  When we'd return at 10:30pm, she'd wrap up her sleeping baby and walk back to her apartment.  Then, on the day we were bringing Jonas home, we asked her to watch Marco from 12:30-4... which turned into 12:30-8.  She was super patient and was not even phased by the fact that we were 4 hours late... I, on the other hand, was about to have a nervous breakdown.  Thank you, Kim!  Thank you for teaching me what it is to put others before yourself and for being so kind and generous with your time.
Other kinds of support have been shown to me as well.  For example, my pump rental had run out, and my friend Hannah had read my post about how I was a slave to the pump and had to pump at home because of the size of it.  Well, Hannah, out of the kindness of her heart, offered to lend me her amazingly effective, amazingly small, and amazingly expensive ($400) pump!  The Medela Free Style.  It rocks!
We also received some yummy support.  This is such a southern thing too... it just doesn't happen in Florida.  I have a baby, and everyone wants to bring me food?  Uhh, ok.  I had never realized what a difference having a meal that I didn't have to consider, plan or create made.  Truth be told, I'm not the chef in my house anyway... but still!  Ok, so Mauricio didn't have to worry about cooking... still great!  The ladies from my MOPS group signed up to bring us meals for nearly two weeks while we were still coming and going from the NICU.  It made our lives so much less stressful... just one less thing to worry about.  Cathy brought us some amazing meatball subs, Lynette brought us hibachi grill meals, Rachael brought us two strombolli's, Cindi brought us some homemade pasta, and Jennifer also brought us some delish pasta.  I was so amazed by the generosity of these women!  These are women with families of their own to feed, and children of their own to care for, and here they were preparing and DELIVERING meals to my family!  And they did not skimp!  Each meal was prepared with thoughtfulness and love... they included extras like bread, salad and even dessert!  I mean, seriously!  It was a full service.  I was so humbled by the servitude of these women... that they would spend their precious money, time and energy to help out a family they barely know.  In reality, although these women are in my MOPS group, I do not know any of them.  They all signed up for this, not because they were my friends and felt obligated, but because they are all Christian women who know what it means to serve.
Throughout all of this I have learned a million lessons.  I have learned that we are not alone and that people are always eager to offer their support.  I have learned that our routines can not be as important as other people's needs.  I have learned that a little sacrifice on my end can make the world of a difference on someone elses end.  I am so blessed to have been on the receiving end of this deal.  I pray that I remember the lessons I've learned through other peoples humility, servitude, generosity and kindness.  I hope that I can one day be on the giving end and pass the blessings on to other people who are in need.