Dentist Disaster!

Yesterday I took the boys for their bi-annual dentist appointment.  I've been taking each of them since they were 1 year old.  Some people (my family) think I'm silly for taking them at this age... "well, you didn't go till you were 8" (gross).  But I take them for 2 very important reasons:
1.  I want it to be normal... and thus not scary.  It's a part of life.  Of healthy hygiene.  And they HAVE to do it... like it or not!
and
2.  The insurance covers it 100%.  We don't even have to pay a copay when we go.  So why wouldn't I take advantage of something that is FREE... or something we're already paying for anyway, whether we go or not.

So we went yesterday.  It was Marco's 4th time and Jonas' 2nd.  But it was a disaster.  It is not yet "normal" for them.

You would think that they were in the back with Iranian torturers as their dentist!  The blood curdling screams were resonating down the hallway.

And all they did was brush their teeth.  With a tooth brush... not an ice pick!

For Marco, they brushed his teeth with the polish, then flossed and last put on floride.
For Jonas they only brushed with polish.

But the screams!  The tears!  The shakes!  The sobs!  It was frightful!

When we finally got in the car, they were both so physically exhausted and drained from their fighting that they were silent and mushy.

This isn't going to change anything... they're still going.

I'm just happy we have a whole 6 months before then!

Womanly Stuff

On Monday I had an appointment with my OB.  I don't know if I should still call it an OB, or now call it Gyno, since technically we're done with the baby having stage... but anyway.

I hadn't been seen at this office since I left Miami in 2005.  And obviously a lot has happened since then... you know, married, 2 kids, tubes tied, etc... But I went back to my previous doctor.  I really like her.  Her practice is professional, super nice and very efficient.  I would have loved having my babies with them.

What I loved most was that before my exam, I got to sit in the doctors office and chat with her about what's new, medical history and any questions.  I got to talk with a doctor, by myself, in private, fully clothed!  How often does THAT happen?  I felt like an ACTUAL person!  I loved that.

Well, while we were having our chat, I filled her in on my baby-having history.  2 babies, 15 months apart, first delivered vaginally, second via c-section and tubal.  When I mentioned the tubal, she immediately pursed her lips.  I did not like this.  I felt a gush of anxiety, "oh no, what did I let those hicks in Greenville do to my fertile baby-making body?!?!".  She thought it was strange that they would push someone so young to have it done... and she asked me if I had any regrets.  I started to feel weepy inside, but I held it all together.

If you've been tracking with me for a while, I've written a few posts about how I felt and feel after having my tubes tied.  You can see them here and here.  So you know I've come to terms with it.  And I told her as much... but watching her reaction made me feel a small sense of panic!

Part of me feels that maaaaaaybe I didn't haaaaave to be so drastic and just maaaaaaaybe that door didn't haaaaaave to close just yet.  Not that there's anything I can do about it now... what's done is done.  Kinda breaks my heart all over again.  Pouring acid in a freshly healed wound.

Then we talked about my massive P.M.S.  I admit it... I'm not always a horrible monster... only the week before my period.  My loving husband pointed out that a week before, I blow up at everything, the smallest thing sets me off and I'm emotional.  At first I was offended that he would blame my "true emotions" on PMS, until I started to notice the pattern... and I can't blind myself from the truth.  So, I'm horrible to him and so short tempered with my kids.  She gave me a low dose of PROZAC!  haha.  But she urged me not to use it without trying other forms of relief such as meditation and exercise.  We'll see what works.  I might look into more homeopathic remedies that do not require me becoming zombie like or working out.

So my yearly appointment was good and bad... mostly good.  Don't have to go through that again for a whole year! yay!

Tubes: Round Two

Today Jonas had ear tubes implanted in both his ears.  This is our second time going through this... we had to get them for Marco back in July.
Read his story HERE.

I'll have to say that I felt a lot more confident and less anxious than the first time around.  We knew the drill and we were perfectly calm.

We arrived at the hospital at 6am and were checked in.  He was scheduled to be the second surgery of the day... since you have to be fasting before surgery, they schedule it by age.  By 7am we were taken into the pre-op room and he was given a bed, a blanket, some stickers and a car.

He was a little confused, but over all very calm and relaxed. Everyone was shocked that a toddler would just lay down in the bed and chill like that.  He's very serious.  It's his way.

Before long, the anesthesiologist came in to give us the run down.  Basically, they'd give him a medicine through the nose that makes them groggy and loopy.  Then once inside the OR, they'd give him the mask which will put him to sleep.  The doctor then performs the procedure and within 5-10 minutes he's back out in recovery.  No needles.  No IV.  No blood at all.  Simple.

Then the doctor came in to answer any further questions we may have had.  We had none.

The nurse came back with the nose medicine.  He wasn't fond of it... I mean, who can blame him?  But within a minute he was acting... drunk.  It was hysterical.  And, yes, we recorded it.  (Maybe I'll grace you with that little gem in the future). 


Since he was so drunk happy, they took him away from us with no problem.  He was gone, we were ushered back into the waiting room and then we waited.

That's the hardest part... waiting.  Every minute feels like 5.  We kept thinking it was taking longer than it had with Marco.  Then a hint of worry set in... what if there was a complication?  What if he's not taking to the anesthesia well? What if......

I prayed that Jesus would guide the doctor, hold tightly to my boy and ease my fears.  Just then the nurse came back in to get us.  We waited for about 10 minutes.

Jonas was just coming out from under... he was crying and confused.  He cried for a while, which is normal.  We tried soothing him with his paci, blanket, a walk to the window and offered him some juice.  He was in such a frenzy that he threw up a little.  We let him cry for about 15 minutes before heading out.  Once we were outside, he was more calm.

We got home at 8:30 and Marco had just woken up.  (No, we didn't leave him alone... my FIL was still home).  Jonas hung out for a while, then decided he was up for playing and by 10 he was completely back to his rascally and mischievous self.

So happy both of my boys are over and done with this... onto more healthy days.

Huh?

I think I'm gonna have to change my blog name... because lately it's been more about me (and my health) than my kids.  Oh well.  It's what's on my mind, so there ya have it.

So anyway, as you read in my last blog post, I've decided to start working on me.  I need to stay healthy.  This body requires a LOT of maintenance... and not for vanity's sake.  This means that I needed to make appointments to see all the doctors that I've been putting on the back burner... like the Gyno, the Dentist and the ENT.

Yesterday we went to the ENT... all 3 of us.  I wanted to recheck Marco's tubes, and verify that one of them had in fact fallen out.  I needed to schedule poor Jonas to have tubes implanted since he had 5 ear infections last year.  And I needed to have my ears checked too, because I've had an ear infection for two and a half years.

Yeah, you read that right... 2.5 years!  Serious procrastination here, people.  You're learning from the best.

But honestly, I hadn't procrastinated THAT bad... I had been to see an ENT before getting pregnant with Jonas, but since I was breastfeeding he couldn't treat me.  The medication is so strong that you can't be breastfeeding with it.  And since I later got pregnant with Jonas, followed by breastfeeding him for 12 months, here we are.  Actually I technically could have gone in September when I quit breastfeeding, but cest la vie.

So, as I said, I took care of it yesterday.  The PA almost went pale when he looked into my left ear.  I knew it was bad, just not that bad.  I haven't had any pain at all, but I have had lots of drainage and hearing loss.

You'd think the hearing loss would get me to a doctor, right?  But no... I'm a stubborn one.

We did a hearing test and I can barely hear from my left.  It was bad.  But the good news is that it's completely reversible.  Apparently my ear is trying to hear, and instead of hearing outside noise, I only hear inside noise... like my blood rushing, my heart beat and my breathing.  My ear is clogged from the outside-in.  Once the clog is cleared, by massive doses of antibiotics and steroids, my hearing should be restored.  Yay!

The infection actually lays in the cavity between my ears... like behind my nose IN my face.  And it's pushing outwardly through both my ears... but my left has taken the biggest beating.  I can't believe I've had an infection IN MY FACE for that long and it hasn't eaten out my brains yet.  Dramatic? yes.

And, hearing is kinda important for a musician, ya know?

I'm looking forward to hearing again.  I wont have to tell my husband to whisper into my "good ear".  I wont have to hold the phone on my right anymore.  I wont have to pretend to have heard what you said and just smile and nod.  I wont constantly be saying "huh?" anymore!



PS. I'm going to start posting a "look back" to help any newcomers to my blog get to know my story better.  So if I post on the same day as I have in the past, I'll put a link at the bottom of my post.  Enjoy!

On this day in 2011:  The Graduate

Working on Me

I am a horrible patient.  I tell my doctors that too... straight up... no sugar coating.  They tell me about a medication and I tell them it's not gonna happen.

I skip doses.
I self medicate.
I procrastinate.

Basically if I don't "feel" like the medication is "working"... and working means instantaneous relief... then I stop.

I think I'm irresponsible about this because I've had these two diseases for such a LONG time that I'm tired of it already.  I've had COPD since birth and RA since I was 17.  I'm over it.

Let me share with you the long laundry list of my medications:
For COPD:
Advair: 1 puff, twice daily

Spiriva: 1 capsule inhaled daily

Combivent: Rescue inhaler as needed

The Vest: Done once daily for 20 minutes.  See my vlog here:

But mine is pretty in PINK!

The Acapella: Breathing exercises one twice daily

For RA:
Enbrel: One injection a week

Methotrexate: 6 pills, once a week

Like I said, over it.  But just because my mind is over it, doesn't mean my body is.

So I went in to the pulmonologist a few weeks ago to do a Pulmonary Function Test (PFT).  It's a machine that you blow into and it measures your lung capacity.  When I did the test back in April, I had about 46% lung function after medication.  This time around it was worse.  Much worse.  So bad, that my doctor refused to even give me a number.  She just told me to be diligent about taking my medications over the next month and we'll take the test again in a month.

Ok, I told her I'd give her ONE month... with no cheating.

And guess what?!  I feel better.

I feel like I can take deeper breaths.  I feel like I'm not as winded while doing my daily activities.  When I lay down at night, I feel like I can exhale fully without hearing a symphony of crackles in my chest.

It's actually quite amazing.

I'm not trying to sound like I'm complaining, and I know I could have it a lot worse.  So I finally realized... after 29 years... that it's time to be responsible.  It's time to work on me... I need to be a grown up now and take care of my OWN health... because no one else is going to do it for me.  And if I skip doses, procrastinate or self medicate, I'm only hurting myself.

And I've decided I want to live for a long time.  Like a really long time.  And not just live... but live WELL.

VLOG: The Vest

Alright guys, I did my very first vlog.  Don't laugh... I'm awkward when recorded.

As you guys may or may not know, on top of having RA, I also have a lung condition, COPD.  I was born with 75% of my lungs not functioning, and I've lived my entire life with lung disease.  At one point, I was placed on a transplant list, but thankfully I've always been "too healthy" to receive a lung.  Currently, I only use about 40% of my lungs.  I'm not supposed to do all the things that I do, but by the grace of God, I do.  Probably because I was born this way, I don't realize just how bad it is.

At my last doctors appointment, she recommended I begin to use The Vest regularly.  The Vest is a machine that has been used for over 20 years now, but is now available for personal use.  You know how when your lungs are really congested you smack your chest and stuff comes up?  Well, basically this machine does that for you... times a hundred.  It fits really tightly and shakes the crap out of you so that the congestion will loosen up and release.  In my case, because of my disease, I am unable to bring all that gunk up, and if it's sits in my lungs, it is more prone to infections such as pneumonia.  And every time I get sick, I further damage my lungs.

This Vest costs a large sum of $16,000!!! Holy cow!  Thank you insurance company!  The good news is that with a price like that, you have the benefit of having a lifetime warrenty.  If anything breaks they replace it for free.  If my vest becomes too small because I've gained weight (I hope this NEVER happens), they'll send me a new one for free.  That's pretty sweet.

So the doctor requested I do it twice a day for 20 minutes.  But, you tell me WHEN I have time for that?  With two crazy toddlers running around?  So I negotiated her down to once a day.  And so far, I've been consistent.

Ok, now let my embarrassment commence as you watch my video.  I hope you're all amused.  And really, if you are in fact amused and would like to see MORE vlogs, just let me know... I aim to please, after all.