Just 5 Minutes

I'm sure by now you've all read the Don't Carpe Diem article that was rocking every mom's world last week.  It was a great article and I felt I could relate to it pretty perfectly.

What the writer says is true... the day to day sucks.  And anyone who thinks or imagines or says that it's "easy" or "joyous" is full of it.  Being a mom is a tiring uphill battle.

My father-in-law says that being a parent is a Horrible Paradise.  I loved that.  A paradise because what is better than having children and seeing them grow?  Nothing.  But it's horrible because it's difficult.

And from moms with grown children, we hear "oh just wait, time goes by so quickly"... and my favorite (because it's true) is "the days are long but the years are short."  The days are tortuously long.

Then this morning I had a little chat with my mom.  She mentioned that she was passing by a landmark where "I used to let you take a sip from your water on long trips".  She was remembering me as a child.  And she started to cry.

One thing about my mom... she cries... a lot.

Me, being used to the waterworks, brushed her off.  But then she said something that struck a chord in me...

"Sometimes I just want 5 minutes with my little girl". 

And then I started to cry.

Although she is so happy and fulfilled to have seen me grow up, have a life of my own and have children of my own, it doesn't change the fact that I'm her baby... and she misses her baby.  Not that she wants me to be a baby... but maybe just for 5 minutes.

And don't I already feel that way?  I look at pictures of my boys, smushy faced and wrinkly, and I want to hold them again... like that... for 5 minutes.

I do not want a newborn... I have no desire to revisit that stage of my life.  But for 5 minutes?  Absolutely.

I'm so happy my children are growing and learning and moving forward every day.  I am proud of the way we're raising them and the values we're instilling in them.  I don't want to stop moving or move backwards.

But I would like a tiny time portal. Is that too much to ask?

Just for 5 minutes.

-------------
On this day in 2011: Proud Musical Mama

4 comments:

Shawna said...

Great post! It's so true...each new stage my girls enter seems even more fun and exciting then the last. Newborns are just so "boring"....but I'd give anything to just cuddle them as newborns again for a few minutes! :-)

Callie Nicole said...

Oh gosh, this made me cry. It's true, and I can already see that when I look at Wyatt's newborn pictures. Reminds me to hold on to these five minutes when I have them.

Callie Nicole said...

Nicole, I wanted to let you know that I tagged you in a post on my blog this week. Sorry if I already mentioned it, I can't remember who I told already and I'm trying to go through my list just to make sure. :-)

Leslie said...

Nicole, so happy to have found your blog! This post rings to true with me. And I love the term "Horrible Paradise"!! Having a time machine would be amazing, so that we could always go back in time and snuggle our little ones, even after they grow up!